Things I learned from Atari...
•Never let a bat see your keys.
•There is no problem that cannot be overcome by force.
•If it moves, DESTROY IT!
•Piloting any vehicle is simple and requires no training.
•One lone “good guy” can defeat an infinite number of “bad guys”.
•Make sure you eat all food lying on the ground.
•You can break things and get away with it.
•You can push other vehicles off the road and get away with it.
•If someone dies, they disappear.
•If you get mad enough, you can fight even better.
•You can operate all weapons without training.
•No matter how long you fight, you can always fight again.
•Death is reversible (only for you!)
•Ninjas are common and frequently fight in public.
•Whenever big fat mean guys are about to croak, they begin flashing red or yellow.
•You never run out of ammunition, just grenades.
•All women wear revealing clothing and have great bodies.
•Shoot everything. If it blows up or dies, it was bad.
•Don’t worry if your vehicles crashes and explodes. A new vehicle will appear in its place.
•A thousand-to-one odds against you is NOT a problem.
•Frogs can't swim
•If you get to the edge of known space, you wrap around to the other side
•One cannot dodge obstacles by getting beside them
•Lasers can't hurt freindlies, unless you are shooting in a maze.
•Fruit and other food is always helpful, be it as bonus points or as a weapon.
•There are no nice robots
•All Gorillas must be at the top of something