InfernalKeith Posted November 20, 2010 Share Posted November 20, 2010 From Keith's Coding and House of Pancakes and Used Tires, we are proud to present our first entry in the Crap Game Competition. We've created perhaps the ultimate simulator ever devised on any platform, ever. It may be too extreme for those of you with weak constitutions. Please consult a doctor before playing. Remember, taking ownership of a virtual pet, even one that straddles a continent and causes global chaos and destruction in the most graphically vivid of ways, is a responsibility. We are offering a substantial prize* to the first person who can raise their pet glacier to maturity without dying of old age or boredom first. Enjoy, and remember, if you like it, our shareware fee is only $39.95 for this bleeding-edge game design technology. Good luck! * Prize will be one (1) bowl of split pea soup. 100 ! MY PET GLACIER 110 ! AA CRAP GAME COMPO 120 ! SUGG. RETAIL $39.95 130 ! (C) 2011 ALL RIGHTS 140 ! FIERCELY RESERVED! 145 GOSUB 10000 150 CALL CLEAR :: F$="" :: CALL COLOR(14,16,1) :: CALL SCREEN(3) 160 FOR X=136 TO 143 :: F$=F$&"FF" :: CALL CHAR(X,F$&(SEG$("0000000000000000",1,16-LEN(F$)))) :: NEXT X 170 P=INT(RND*6)+1 :: FOR X=1 TO P-1 :: DISPLAY AT(X,1):RPT$(CHR$(143),28) :: NEXT X 180 Q=INT(RND*+1 :: DISPLAY AT(P,1):RPT$(CHR$(135+Q),28) 190 FOR X=1 TO 20 :: CALL SOUND(2000,INT(RND*2)-7,22) :: NEXT X 200 Q=Q+1 :: IF Q<8 THEN 230 210 P=P+1 :: IF P=25 THEN 240 220 DISPLAY AT(P-1,1):RPT$(CHR$(143),28) :: Q=0 :: GOTO 190 230 DISPLAY AT(P,1):RPT$(CHR$(Q+135),28) :: GOTO 190 240 CALL CLEAR :: CALL SCREEN(7) 250 CALL SOUND(4000,-7,0) :: FOR X=1 TO 1000 :: NEXT X :: CALL SCREEN( 260 PRINT "A METEOR HIT THE EARTH AND KILLED YOUR PET GLACIER. NO REFUNDS, JACK." 270 END 10000 CALL CLEAR :: PRINT " MY PET GLACIER V1.0" 10010 PRINT: : : : : : 10020 PRINT "TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR VERY OWN GLACIER AS IT TEARS ACROSS A CONTINENT AT SPEEDS" 10030 PRINT "OF UP TO ONE INCH PER YEAR! NOTHING SAYS EXTREME LIKE A VIRTUAL PET THAT CREATES" 10040 PRINT "AN EXTINCTION-LEVEL ICE AGE OVER A PERIOD OF CENTURIES!" 10050 PRINT: : : : 10060 PRINT "PRESS ANY KEY TO HAVE FUN!!!" 10070 CALL KEY(0,K,S) :: IF S=0 THEN 10070 10080 RETURN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sometimes99er Posted November 20, 2010 Share Posted November 20, 2010 Ice crap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jchase1970 Posted November 20, 2010 Share Posted November 20, 2010 this great, I always want a pet glacier but could never bear the cold weather, now I can stay toasty warm next to my computer and have me pet right besides me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unhuman Posted November 21, 2010 Share Posted November 21, 2010 I can't figure out how to play.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InfernalKeith Posted November 21, 2010 Author Share Posted November 21, 2010 I should have included instructions, I apologize. 1. RUN game. 2. Thrill to the realistic ice floe graphics and the stereophonic sounds of wintry fury. 3. Watch your glacier carefully. If it grows, you're winning. 4. Strategy hint: don't blink a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unhuman Posted November 21, 2010 Share Posted November 21, 2010 Now I feel like I've got my 39.95's worth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Opry99er Posted November 21, 2010 Share Posted November 21, 2010 Wow... What a piece of crap.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InfernalKeith Posted November 21, 2010 Author Share Posted November 21, 2010 Wow... What a piece of crap.... It was a toss-up whether to develop this fine software product first, or rush our "Paint Drying 1.0" simulator to market. I think we made the right decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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