+Lathe26 Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Warning: AtariAge can be DANGEROUS to Your Health! Walking on my way to work, I was reading AtariAge on my smartphone when a monstrous branch bedecked in thorns used this distraction to its advantage and leapt at my face to attack me. Its first blow slashed above my eye in a deliberate attempt to blind me. Momentarily stunned, I henceforth took to task and soundly smote the fiend.Dazed as I was from this attack and with reduced vision from the crimson fluid ushering forth, I bravely dragged my wounded body to a facility that proved the urgent care I desperately needed. The wise and steadfast doctor was able to stem the tide from what surely would otherwise have been a mortal blow. My weakened and wounded body will take time to heal but with my doting wife by my side and by my resolve I will arise a better man.I have long overlooked the safety issues of this site, but no more! Here are a list of safety requirements to be implemented by AtariAge: Add a warning label at the top of every page that states "The Surgeon General has determined that viewing AtariAge can be hazardous to your health." Change site colors to yellow and black and get rid of the current calming blue and grey. Instructional safety videos will play on the left and right side of the web pages at all times. AtariAge will supply a 1-800 phone number to address any injury claims AtariAge will supply financial aid for next-of-kin Special safety goggles will be provided free of charge 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Lathe26 Posted July 15, 2015 Author Share Posted July 15, 2015 Ok, joking aside, I was a dumbass today. I was walking to work, paying too much attention to AtariAge on my smartphone, and walked into a low-hanging rose bush branch. A thorn got me good above the eye and a few drops of blood got onto my glasses ("reduced vision"). I snapped that branch off where it hung at eye level ("smote the fiend") so it wouldn't get anyone else. I walked to one of those urgent care places since the cut was rather close to my eye and the cut was a little deeper than the average cut. Stitches weren't necessary, but the doctor just put a couple drops of surgical glue on so that it would heal nicely. Everything should heal up quickly.Of course, this was 100% my fault (no silly changes for AtariAge). I just thought I'd add a little entertainment for today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+cmart604 Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Hahaha! Well written. ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+BBWW Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Ouch! At least your weren't driving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+JasonlikesINTV Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Those rules could have been written by the company I work for. No walking and texting...check No surfing AtariAge at work...check Safety Goggles required...check Corrective Action to prevent further issues...check Right-to-know warning sign hung up (cheap and limits company liability)...check Retraining via monthly instructional safety video...check Daily 10 min group meeting to discuss ongoing proactive safety and process improvement ideas...ugh 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Intymike Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 No Atari Age user injured since 145 days...damned...since 0 day! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Albert Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 No Atari Age user injured since 145 days...damned...since 0 day! Maybe I should put this on the front page and update as needed. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegamezmaster Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Sorry hear and hope you're ok,! Take care! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric7100 Posted July 15, 2015 Share Posted July 15, 2015 Roses are evil. I thought everybody knew that. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freewheel Posted July 16, 2015 Share Posted July 16, 2015 Did people used to walk around reading books back in the day? Also, I'd swear Jason works in the oilpatch. I remember the days of trying to come up with "safety tips" - for a bunch of office workers whose biggest risk was a paper cut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atari5200dude82 Posted July 16, 2015 Share Posted July 16, 2015 (edited) , Sorry to Hear that . Poor Rose Bush. lol.And your eye . Yes and Atari age is very addicting, as well. We need a Triple AAA, Atari Age Anomoyous Edited July 16, 2015 by atari5200dude82 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+JasonlikesINTV Posted July 16, 2015 Share Posted July 16, 2015 Did people used to walk around reading books back in the day? Also, I'd swear Jason works in the oilpatch. I remember the days of trying to come up with "safety tips" - for a bunch of office workers whose biggest risk was a paper cut. Chemical industry Office workers report paper cuts and spilling 1 dram of water. I gash my finger and I'm pretty sure it happen at home Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oscar G. Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 Fun read and wishes for a quick recovery! Cheers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m-crew Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 Every Rose Has a thorn!!!! Heal up and great read as mentioned... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_intv Posted August 2, 2015 Share Posted August 2, 2015 Maybe I should put this on the front page and update as needed. Most definitely! That would be funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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