(Insert stupid Blog name here) - McIdiots

RSS Bot · March 31, 2007

So... I went to McDonald's for lunch today.

Usually, I avoid McDonald's. Childhood memories aside, their food is generally garbage, and they have idiots working there.

Now, I'm not saying everyone who works at a McDonald's is an idiot. Sometimes we're forced by economic circumstances to work in places we don't want to. And let's face it - nearly every place has at least one idiot working there.

But at McDonald's, they tend to put the idiots in the Drive-Thru. I have proof of this.

Whenever I go to McDonald's, I order basically the same thing: A Quarter Pounder meal, no cheese, with a Coke.

And it seems, more times than I can recount, they've gotten that order wrong.

It ain't rocket science, people.

Usually, they miss the "no cheese" part. I believe this is because the Quarter Pounder is not called a "Quarter Pounder", but rather a "Quarter Pounder with Cheese". Originally, it was just a "Quarter Pounder". Then they decided, for some reason, to make the cheese a permanent part of it. Like the Big Mac. Except, of course, that isn't called a "Big Mac with Cheese". It's just a "Big Mac".

So when you order a Quarter Pounder with no cheese, this confuses them. Because now, it's a "Quarter Pounder with Cheese, without Cheese".

They actually say that. Try it sometime. It's fun. (In a "shove bamboo shoots under your fingernails" sort-of-way.)

So most of the time when they get it wrong, I end up with a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, without Cheese, with Cheese. Or rather, whatever passes for cheese at McDonald's.

Have you ever smelled their cheese? No cheese I know of smells like that.

So, I usually end up throwing away the burger, and going somewhere else to eat. It's less hassle than going back through the line at McDonald's, and trying to explain how they got my order wrong, and now I'm stuck with this vomitous, coagulated mess, that a starving dog would turn up his nose at.

But they've gotten the order wrong other ways, too. One time, it came without onions. Still had the cheese, but no onions.

One time, it came without anything. Just meat and a bun.

Now there are only five condiments on this thing. Cheese, ketchup, mustard, pickles and onions. That's it. You wouldn't think that would cause so much consternation. But unlike Burger King, apparently special orders do upset them.

Which brings me to today.

I order my Quarter Pounder meal without cheese, and they repeat the order correctly, so I know that they had it in their brains at least long enough to repeat it.

I get my meal, and park somewhere to eat. Then I open the little box, pop off the top bun, and behold! No cheese! The mustard is there. The ketchup is there. The onions and pickles are there. Good! They got it right.

Then... I noticed something.

There is no bottom bun.

I'm not even sure how they did that. You'd think something like that would be difficult to overlook. But there it sat... no bottom bun.

Surprised, but not undaunted, I simply flipped the whole thing over, and ate it like an open-faced sandwich.

The scary thing? It was actually better that way. Less stale bread to choke down, I suppose.

Maybe I'll eat at McDonald's again. But I'm not sure how I'd get them to leave off the bottom bun. I'm afraid I'd end up getting a Coke with no cup.

http://www.atariage.com/forums/index.php?a...;showentry=3105