Funniest "Jag-bashing" experience?

[Ferris]

With all this talk of the Jaguar and its "bits" or supposed lack thereof, I can't help but think of all the times I've been through this conversation with the hordes of uninformed people who felt the need to talk down our beloved system, and how every once in a while the conversation would just turn damn funny. I think I've heard some of the most ridiculous arguments in my life spawn from Jaguar discussions.

 

The purpose of this thread is NOT to debate the Jaguar, it is to share FUNNY past experiences with talking to people about the Jag. Please do not ruin this thread with comparisons, etc.

 

Okay... *phew* ...that being said, on with the show...

 

I was the first kid in my state to have the Jag and back in sixth grade I was quite the Jag evangelist. I could never understand why these people felt the need to bash the Jag. Maybe they felt outdone by the cutting edge new offering from Atari... Maybe people are just scared of things they don’t understand or scared of things that don’t mesh with what’s mainstream at the time. (it was always the same kid on the bus that would tout the praises of "Woops there it is" or KrisKross that would talk down the Jag... go figure) While everyone else was still piddling around with SNES/GEN in 1993 I had a Jag in addition to those systems... and it seemed to me that about 25% of the people who came into contact with me and my Jag would immediately turn defensive as if the mere existence of the Jag all of a sudden made their pile of $79.95 Gen carts irrelevant.

 

Thing is, every once in a while I'd get engaged in a conversation with someone totally ill-informed about the Jag who would make the most ridiculous argument against the Jaguar or site something totally off the wall as a source for their argument. Being in sixth grade in a small town in South Carolina at the time certainly did not help. One guy told me that the Jaguar was "the devil's video game" because that’s what his pastor said. Something to do with mind control I think, who knows. Another kid later on told me that the Jaguar was "only 56-bit" because he "did the math just like the ad says, and if the Jag only has two 32-bit chips then that makes it 56-bit, not 64." (needless to say my school's math program was terrible.)

 

I remember early on before the Jag even came out one of my friends at the time was already talking it down because “Genesis has an Aerosmith game (Revolution-X) coming out and all Jaguar is going to have is a game about that Perfect Strangers show.” A Jag game about Balki Bartokomous and Cousin Larry running around Mypos? LOL sure, sounds like the latest release from The Savage Team!

 

That same kid on the bus who seemed to think the world of "Tag Team" and KrissKross tried to tell me once that "the Jag-wire is dangerous! It was recalled because the controllers would short out and explode in your hand and 3 kids in Arizona had already died from playing it. You need to go give it to the police!" Oh my god. I just started cracking up.

 

This kid was obsessed with explosions anyway. I remember a few years later when I was old enough to drive I had saved up and bought a DeLorean which was my childhood dream car... of course this same kid decided to bash that too (after all it was another unique toy much like the Atari Jaguar) and used the same explosion story again .... "I was at a red light and I seen this DeLorean sitting there and the engine just exploded for no reason other than it was a piece of crap. The whole front end of the car fell off and collapsed when the engine exploded" ....funny thing is, the engine is in the BACK of that car, not in the front! Needless to say he was busted as being a bigmouth liar and he just sat there quietly for the rest of the class.

 

Anyway back to the Jag...

 

I’ve heard so many BS arguments thrown around, and all I can ever do is sit back and laugh and have a good time. After reading through the last two threads where someone felt the need to puke all over the Jag I thought it would be great to hear other AtariAgers share their stories from around the world.

 

Lol anyone have any good ones?

 

(please no argumentative posts)

[Gregory DG]

Here's mine.

[Hyper_Eye]

Here's mine. 

895263[/snapback]

 

I hope you are joking and don't actually expect anyone to believe that is real.

[Ferris]

Lol I forgot one other great one....

 

In 1994 this kid tried to tell me "Well 3DO is better than Jaguar because 3DO is 3D thats why its called 3DO cause Jaguar is only 2D."

 

Even funnier was actually a friend of mine who was enthusiastic about Jaguar when it was new. He was a nice kid, but he wasnt the brightest. Once we were sitting in class in 6th grade talking and he goes "yeah that Jaguar is a hot system... I think it looks a lot better than Three Doo." ..........so I sit there for a minute thinking to myself "Three Doo"?? I was piecing it together and right as I was about to ask him what he meant he goes "That Three Doo Road Rash game looks good though" and I realized he meant 3DO but didnt know any better.

 

Fun times!

[Shaggy the Atarian]

I don't recall ever going through anything as funny as your experiences, most of the ignorance I've seen has dealt with them not understanding the specifications of the machine. I remember debating about it back in high school with some aquaintences. They were intentionally saying it wasn't 64-bit just to annoy, but they knew that it was.

 

I had a good experience once tohugh, I was at a local game store that sold Jag stuff at the time(this was around 97/98) and they had Zero 5 on display. Some people came in and were playing the game, saying good stuff about it and asked if it was a CD game.

[Songbird]

I had a good experience once tohugh, I was at a local game store that sold Jag stuff at the time(this was around 97/98) and they had Zero 5 on display. Some people came in and were playing the game, saying good stuff about it and asked if it was a CD game.

 

Zero 5 is one of my favorite choices for demoing the Jaguar at game conventions. Even though the game gets insanely hard after the first few levels, it's just so amazing to see those graphics flying around with pumping music and not a hint of slowdown. I've sold multiple Jaguars thanks to that game alone.

 

Of course T2K and Prot SE also tend to be popular choices... Skyhammer is another good demo game, but it takes some 'splainin to help people know what to do.

[Shaggy the Atarian]

I had a good experience once tohugh, I was at a local game store that sold Jag stuff at the time(this was around 97/98) and they had Zero 5 on display. Some people came in and were playing the game, saying good stuff about it and asked if it was a CD game.

 

Zero 5 is one of my favorite choices for demoing the Jaguar at game conventions. Even though the game gets insanely hard after the first few levels, it's just so amazing to see those graphics flying around with pumping music and not a hint of slowdown. I've sold multiple Jaguars thanks to that game alone.

 

Of course T2K and Prot SE also tend to be popular choices... Skyhammer is another good demo game, but it takes some 'splainin to help people know what to do.

895465[/snapback]

 

Yeah the difficulty on that game turns a lot of people off to it, but if you stick it out it's a great shooter. I'm glad that Telegames released it. The later trench levels are amazing.

[Ralph3]

....and used the same explosion story again .... "I was at a red light and I seen this DeLorean sitting there and the engine just exploded for no reason other than it was a piece of crap.  The whole front end of the car fell off and collapsed when the engine exploded" ....funny thing is, the engine is in the BACK of that car, not in the front!  Needless to say he was busted as being a bigmouth liar and he just sat there quietly for the rest of the class.

 

895246[/snapback]

Did you ask him what color the Delorean was? Of course if he said anything but silver you knew he was lynig also.

[Lastblade]

I had a good experience once tohugh, I was at a local game store that sold Jag stuff at the time(this was around 97/98) and they had Zero 5 on display. Some people came in and were playing the game, saying good stuff about it and asked if it was a CD game.

 

Zero 5 is one of my favorite choices for demoing the Jaguar at game conventions. Even though the game gets insanely hard after the first few levels, it's just so amazing to see those graphics flying around with pumping music and not a hint of slowdown. I've sold multiple Jaguars thanks to that game alone.

 

Of course T2K and Prot SE also tend to be popular choices... Skyhammer is another good demo game, but it takes some 'splainin to help people know what to do.

895465[/snapback]

 

Are you planning on getting more of Zero 5? I am interested in buying this game but it is backordered on your site.... Thanks!

[panda_racer]

my friend told me about how she'd played games like cybermorph on a SNES. she said it was a rip-off of Star Fox. I told her that she was thinking of Star Fox 64.. but she didn't believe me.

[+Sauron]

I think many of the funniest "Jag-bashes" are on this very forum. In fact, just look at a couple of the many locked threads for prime examples!

[Needles Kane]

....and used the same explosion story again .... "I was at a red light and I seen this DeLorean sitting there and the engine just exploded for no reason other than it was a piece of crap.  The whole front end of the car fell off and collapsed when the engine exploded" ....funny thing is, the engine is in the BACK of that car, not in the front!  Needless to say he was busted as being a bigmouth liar and he just sat there quietly for the rest of the class.

 

895246[/snapback]

Did you ask him what color the Delorean was? Of course if he said anything but silver you knew he was lynig also.

895471[/snapback]

 

Didn't they also make gold ones? I saw a gold DeLorean once, but it may have been custom painted.

[carmel_andrews]

am i stupid or does 'bashing' a jaguar usually end up with the jaguar owner with a 'bashed up' non working jaguar... I thought that these 'my thing is better/longer/snazzier then your thing' arguments was consigned to the school playground (bearing in mind i left secondary sch. over half a lifetime ago), i was under the illusion that these atari related forums were oriented towards an ADULT audience... c'mon guy's and gal's we're better then this

[Ferris]

am i stupid or does 'bashing' a jaguar usually end up with the jaguar owner with a 'bashed up' non working jaguar... I thought that these 'my thing is better/longer/snazzier then your thing' arguments was consigned to the school playground (bearing in mind i left secondary sch. over half a lifetime ago), i was under the illusion that these atari related forums were oriented towards an ADULT audience... c'mon guy's and gal's we're better then this

 

Uhhh maybe you missed the point of this thread. The entire purpose is to illustrate the absurdity of these Jaguar arguments, they are so pointless! Lol its just that so many of them are just so humorous that its fun to share stories of rediculous things people say. I think your disgust would be better directed at those that wont stop posting about "how many bits does the Jag have" in this forum. Lol this is just to share funny stories. Good times!

 

Did you ask him what color the Delorean was? Of course if he said anything but silver you knew he was lynig also.

 

He used to say dumb stuff about the car all the time, by this time it was like 1996 or 1997 and the Jag wasn't so much a hot topic in the game magazines any longer so he switched his bashing to the car. He always had some dumb thing to say.

 

Didn't they also make gold ones? I saw a gold DeLorean once, but it may have been custom painted.

 

Yes there were three Gold ones produced at the factory. None of them were painted gold, they were actually made of gold. The first two were produced for a 1981 American Express catalogue offering. The third was produced in 1983 and was the last car off the line. Any painted ones you see were all aftermarket.

[carmel_andrews]

De Lorean Car's... Weren't they made in Northern Ireland, funded by a UK and Local government grant, and Audited by, and wait for it...ARTHUR ANDERSEN (come back enron worldcomm, parmalat, all is forgiven... oh no forget parmalat that was deliotte's doings). And lastly run by an AMERICAN (who screwed the british governemt big time... which is why Andersens were in the Governement's banned list for so long) not that i want to rake over old bones

 

I wonder IF MJF ever managed to get the car working in BTTF parts 1/2 and 3 (it won't start.. please see the post on ...time travel)

 

Here's a play on 'my things' better etc etc then 'your thing'

 

Steve Backley to Jan Zelezny...' nah nah nah nah nah, My javelins longer then yours'

 

London Motorist to Michael 'smuckface' schumacher 'give me 20 years going up and down the A501 (both sides/full lenght) and i'll beat you to pole by .1 of a second

 

That Yank that recently reduced the 100 mtr. record to sub 9.75 region...'Perhaps if i gave Carl lewis a walking stick, give him 20 years and he would have beatenme to the tape by .1 of of a second

 

Tiger woods and Golf's 10th major victory... Tell you what Jack, I'll play with a patch over me good eye, with one arm behind my back and using only a 1 wood and a putter as my clubs for ever major championship until i'm 30 and i'll still beat you by 2'

 

lance armstrong and the tour de france...'I've just sent an invitation to Tanni grey-thompson to appear as my stand in should i have any mis haps between now and paris... as tanni is pretty usefull on TWO Wheels' (or was it 4)

Edited July 21, 2005 by carmel_andrews

[Ferris]

*cough*

 

yeah so uh back to the Jag.....

[Songbird]

Are you planning on getting more of Zero 5?  I am interested in buying this game but it is backordered on your site....  Thanks!

895502[/snapback]

 

Yes, I will be getting more of the Telegames games in the near future... hopefully August sometime. Stay tuned!

[Atari_Jaguar]

Lol I forgot one other great one....

 

In 1994 this kid tried to tell me "Well 3DO is better than Jaguar because 3DO is 3D thats why its called 3DO cause Jaguar is only 2D."

 

Even funnier was actually a friend of mine who was enthusiastic about Jaguar when it was new.  He was a nice kid, but he wasnt the brightest.  Once we were sitting in class in 6th grade talking and he goes "yeah that Jaguar is a hot system... I think it looks a lot better than Three Doo."  ..........so I sit there for a minute thinking to myself "Three Doo"?? I was piecing it together and right as I was about to ask him what he meant he goes "That Three Doo Road Rash game looks good though" and I realized he meant 3DO but didnt know any better. 

 

Fun times!

895280[/snapback]

 

HA HA HA HA HA HA! Mildly retarded people are always good for a laugh. Thanks for sharing.

 

Best Regards,

Doug

 

Currently playing "BRUTAL SPORTS FOOTBALL" for the Atari Jaguar Console.

Edited July 25, 2005 by Atari_Jaguar

[Atari-Jess]

in concluesion, i think you shuld all justgive your jagars away.

[sega saturn x]

I personally love all the jaguar arguments truly priceless.

[A.J. Franzman]

Did you ask him what color the Delorean was? Of course if he said anything but silver you knew he was lynig also.

895471[/snapback]

Didn't they also make gold ones? I saw a gold DeLorean once, but it may have been custom painted.

895647[/snapback]

There were 3 gold plated Deloreans (not painted, really GOLD PLATED! {Gold Deloreans}) made by the factory, 2 were special production '81 models and the 3rd was the very last Delorean built, made from leftover spare parts from the first 2 gold Deloreans. The original price for these was around $85,000. Now of course they're all museum pieces - one is in the Petersen Automotive Museum here in L.A.

 

Also, used car dealers did sometimes paint Deloreans, which required a special process to adhere to the stainless steel and fill the brushed texture smooth. Black, white and red were popular colors. This may have been done primarily to hide repaired body damage - certain parts such as the left front fender/quarter panel are almost impossible to get replacements for, so straightening, body filler and paint might be the only option to make the car presentable again.

Edited July 25, 2005 by A.J. Franzman

[Trip_Cannon]

I don't have a story per say... just the weird look the salesman gave me when I actually bought a Jaguar... I got an even weirder look when I bought the CD add-on...

[Atari-Jess]

None of my friends like it, but only for reasons that are true.

 

"bashing" usually involves things that aren't true.

 

Even when I bought my sealed games a couple years ago I didn't get any strange looks from the wearhouse that sold em or anything.

[Gregory DG]

in concluesion, i think you shuld all justgive your jagars away.

897872[/snapback]

[Mindfield]

The only "amusing" Jag Bashing I remember was from back in the day on rec.games.video.atari. There was a regular Mac user there named Peter Sinclair (username "sinclap") who was absolutely, totally, unrelentingly obsessed with bashing anything Atari, and in particular the Jaguar. He always stuck to his assertions, false or otherwise, and tried to introduce all kinds of idiotic examples as proof of his claims. And he would do this endlessly and would respond to practically any thread that had anything at all to do with the system or its specs. He was annoying at first, but eventually he was like the group's whipping boy -- nobody liked him, we all thought he was mentally deficient, but he was a great lightning rod to draw all the criticisms to. If you were one who wanted to avoid the bashing and just get to the interesting posts of new games, GEnie RTC transcripts or the latest Atari Explorer Online, you just had to filter out any thread with Peter in it and you had a nice clean newsgroup.